Well, time for the haters’ ball. These are the top 50 fantasy draft picks for September, according to the NFFC ADP (127 draft picks).
A good way to be imaginative is to choose players based on what could go right and then flip your mindset once the season starts to think about what could go wrong. This way, you can ease expectations, nip problems in the bud, and be more objective about what you have and what you need. So, there is something useful to take away from this misinformation beyond confronting all of our post-purchase fears.
1. Justin Jefferson, MIN, WR – (1.17 ADP): You’re practically sensitive to landing the #1 overall pick (one in 16 catches versus one in 14 for the average WR).
2. Jamar Chase, CIN, WR – (2.38): Yards of air per target decreased by 3.5 yards from 2021 to 2022. A happy medium must be found in 2023 to capture projected market share.
3. Christian McCaffrey, SF, RB – (3.32): He has now played 27 games in the past three seasons combined.
4. Terek Hill, MIA, WR – (4.21): The starting QB is a jab away from handing the reins to Mike White, who himself has concussion issues.
5. Austin Eckler, LAC, RB — (6): The offensive coordinator was fired because Eckler was too involved with the passing offense and because the running game lacked fitness. Freshman OC Kellen Moore is targeting 17.1% of regional attempts versus 25.9% for the LAC in 2022.
6. Travis Kelsey, KC, TE – (6.45): Overextended knee (status unknown) makes the question of when the circus will leave town for Kelsey very clear. Would turning 34 come as a shock, or should we have expected it to happen?
7. Stephon Diggs, BUF, WR — (7.65): Last we saw him, he was visibly yelling at his QB and then reportedly asked to be traded.
8. Til Robinson, ATL, RB – (10.32): The spectacle of a fictional unseen first-round pick — with so much uncertainty in the middle — seems like a risky recipe for a tournament-level draft.
9. Sir Lamb, D, WR – (10.48): More branches on the passing tree now and arguably fewer goals due to Dak Prescott’s turnover issues/anticipated switch to game manager.
10.. Amun-Ra St. Brown, DET, WR – (10.72): Really, really hates relegation – 1 goal every 24.3 goals in 2022.
11. IJ Brown, Faye, WR — (11.69): There aren’t a lot of pass attempts and touchdowns expected in this offense and he has two elite receivers competing with him for goals.
12. Garrett Wilson, New York, WR — (11.9): When were airplanes allowed to have pretty things?
13. Saquon Barkley, NYG, RB – (12.17): RB7 in the second half of 2022 on PPR by five points more than Joe Mixon and Naji Harris who are available later.
14. Nick Chubb, CLE, RB – (13.93): A great player averaging 16 carries a game into his career for some reason.
15. Davante Adams, LV, WR – (15.64): The football gods conspire to make Adams prove immune to the vagaries of playing and coaching a QB. “Here are your millstones, Davante. Carry them!”
16. Tony Pollard, DAL, RB — (15.73): He’s never done it before, but we’re paying the price for “he’ll do it.” Could it be a rattlesnake calf, let alone an actual rattlesnake cow?
17. Patrick Mahomes, KC, QB — (17.45): Getting a QB early is how you feel short for the rest of the season, but at least in the end you’ve got the most fungible commodity in our game.
18. Cooper Cobb, Lahr, WR — (19.28): Learn about the new ADP. There are many reasons to run away from a player – age, injury, injury history, QB uncertainty, and a bad team going nowhere.
19. Jaylen Waddell, MIA, WR – (19.95): Unhappily short of Tyreek Hill’s targets – 30% less than last year. So, you’re betting the beast’s efficiency continues with the quarterback the league seemed to have spotted when we last saw him.
20. Chris Olaf, NO, WR – (21.18): It’s funny how Davante Adams was penalized for QB Derek Carr and now Olaf is expected to part ways with Carr. TD every 30 goals in 2022.
21. Jalen Hertz, Faye, QB – (22.18): Quarterbacks are just flying into the draft boards like a Game Stop stock in the 2021 short squeeze, forcing all the Ferrets to buy at inflated prices.
22. Derek Henry, TEN, RB – (22.2): 6-foot-3+ Running linebacker with over 200 fantasy PPR points by age 30: Chuck Muncie 1983, 40 years ago. (Henry will miss the 2023 season as he turns 30 by five days). That’s it.
23. Josh Allen, BUF, QB – (22.55): Teams that draft QBs at this level have no QB advantage against seven other teams and a clear disadvantage in RB/WR against four other teams. The Bills expressed frustration with Allen’s frequent (reckless) running, which served as the backbone of his imaginative recording.
24. Devonta Smith, Fay, WR – (22.67): The second head of the receiving Hydra in a passing attack is expected to be in third place in terms of target size.
25. Josh Jacobs, LV, RB – (24.38): It’s just a medical fact that 400-touch RBs turn into soft porcelain the following season.
26. Calvin Ridley, JAC, WR – (26.83): If you like the after-effects of Deshaun Watson’s layoff, you can now see what’s going on with the WR who hasn’t had a chance since October 2021.
27. Higgins T, C, WR – (26.93): 101 goals in 12 games with Jamar Chase.
28. DK Metcalfe, SEA, WR – (29.05): Geno Smith’s first 12 games of 2022: 8.1 yards per attempt, six picks. Last five games of 2022: 6.2 yards per attempt, five picks. Has the clock already reached midnight?
29. Keenan Allen, LAC, WR – (31.91): Energy vampires drain their victims by entertaining Keenan Allen’s gaming records.
30. JHMIR Gibbs, DET, RB – (33.16): The freshman CJ Spiller, RB64 in PPR points per game as a junior (2010). Spiller was the ninth overall pick in the real NFL Draft and is Gibbs’ top pick in the player profile. in good health!
31. Mark Andrews, BAL, TE – (33.8): Averages 11.2 points per game if we exclude the 2021 season, and has the busiest receiving room on paper of his career.
32. Ramondri Stephenson, NE, RB – (34.58): Farhan didn’t move to the ADP after the team imported branded veteran Ezekiel Elliott to share the load. Few have done less to score as many goals as Stevenson in 2022.
33. Naji Harris, PIT, RB – (34.73): New Ezekiel Elliott to Tony Pollard from Gaylene Warren. Enjoy!
34. Debo Samuel, SF, WR – (35.83): By far the 49ers’ most expensive receiver, so logic would say he’s the absolute best in real life, but he’s definitely not (George Keitel).
35. Joe Burrow, CIN, QB – (36.46): “What if everyone drafted a QB in the first three rounds?” My mom asks after asking what we will do if everyone jumps off the bridge.
36. Travis Etienne, JAC, RB – (37.15): First drive of the season. It’s the first goal on the three-yard line. What RB is in the field for Jacksonville, Etienne, or Tank Bigsby? TD regression probably won’t be positive.
37. Lamar Jackson, BAL, QB – (37.53): Another full-back? Has everyone gone crazy? We’re all going to start our QBs, kids.
38. Amari Cooper, Klee, WR (37.65): Rodney Dangerfield is a wide receiver. If QB Deshaun Watson played in a sandbox last year, the cat would still be covering him.
39. Joe Mixon, CIN, RB – (38.95): A trademark Kirkland-level talent.
40. DJ Moore, Chi, WR – (39.19): The wide side of the barn that Justin Fields will try to hit hard.
41. Justin Herbert, LAC, QB — (40.05): Mr. Smallpole. The proverbial home hitter who steps to the plate on every at-bat shoots a home run.
42. Christian Watson, GB, WR — (41.97): He’s been in the league for five minutes and he’s already had a torn knee, torn hamstring and suffered a concussion. He also had hamstring problems in college.
43. DAndre Hopkins, TN, WR – (43.21): It’s hard to get a WR into the Top 50 when nobody’s drafting their own QB into the Top 30. It might actually be unprecedented.
44. Drake London, ATL, WR — (45.6): 30.5% goals ratio with Desmond Ridder, so 3.05 goals per game is guaranteed.
45. Aaron Jones, GB, RB — (47.05): We dream of 300 carries for RBs, but even 200 is a question for Jones. He’s also an below-average receiver (5.7 yards per goal) on a team that will likely score far less than 2020-2022, given the unknowns at QB.
46. TJ Hawkinson, Maine, TE – (48.23): Minnesota’s Mr. Inefficiency (6.0 yards per goal). His Y/T ranks 20th out of 23 TE’s in goal era (at least 50 goals). Between Jermaine Wiggins and Vizanthe Cianco – Elite Company!
47. Trevor Lawrence, JAC, QB – (50.75): The QB’s early round is an indictment of the entire industry. Everything is stupid again. Hey, the QBs scored the most points, so they should be the first 30 picks – amirite!?
48. Darren Waller, NYG, TE – (50.9): The Giants are moving on from Kenny Golladi by acquiring a TE whose star faded just like that of Golladi when the Giants signed him. Waller: 9.8 yards/goal in 2019 and 8.0 since then.
49. Justin Fields, CHI, QB — (51.68): QB inflation is a condemnation of biodynamics, but no one is talking about it! Two-thirds of the teams set fire to an early QB run. I see a way to greatly increase the probability of winning. Maybe the QBs draft is based on 2000-2021, not 2022?
50. Deontay Johnson, Pete, WR – (53.03): Combines terrible overall efficiency with terrible landing efficiency. How can we say no? Johnson needed 167 touchdowns last year to reach 1,000 yards and multiple universes to score a TD.
(Top photo: Nick Cammett/Getty Images)
(tags for translation) Fantasy football