Toto, we are not in Kansas anymore.

My life before during and after divorce has been much like the movie the Wizard of OZ.

I started out like Dorothy, feeling like an Orphan in my marriage, not really knowing if I was loved or wanted at all.   I finally came to the conclusion I had to leave, I could no longer stay where I was.

I gathered up a few things I couldn’t live without and started walking, while I was walking I started to feel a powerful storm moving in and I tried to get back to safety, but it was too late I had created my own Tornado and there was no escaping it now.

My entire life had been lifted up into a vortex and then slammed down in to unknown territory.

house wizard

I have since then  walked through the rain, the wind , the hail, had to dodge flying objects as they hurled themselves against me.

Met and even dated some very different little men that wanted to welcome me in to this strange new land I had arrived in.  ( Really? how could I not insert some lollipop men humor. )

I have also learned a few things along the way

  • I needed to get stuck sometimes on my way through this, in the deep tangled forest , I needed to learn how to maneuver myself from the grip of the branches constantly reaching to pull me back in to their darkness , so that if I ever found myself approaching or walking in to this forest again I would then have  the tools and the where with all to free myself .

haunted_forest_Large_

  • I needed to learn that the flying monkeys were my demons and for as long as I let them they would follow me everywhere , kidnap me when I least expected it and ultimately hold me hostage.  I needed to  face them head on, as terrified as I was to do so .  I needed to discover that once I dealt with and destroyed them I would only then appreciate the freedom bestowed upon me.

winkies

  • I needed to learn that I harbored within me,  two witches:  The good- witch and the bad- witch:  that I had to fully and completely listen to and understand  each of them . I had to get to know the Bad- witch so that I could use her strength to stand  unafraid and fight  for what I needed and wanted, even if I had to scare a few people along the way.    I had to tell the good witch that even though I loved her very much and she had safely so far in my life gotten me to where I needed to be, it was time for her to meet her sister from the dark side.     They live safely together with me now and have become great roommates.

the good witch and the bad witch

  • I needed to learn that my truest friends would walk beside me , they would never judge me or turn away from me when I was afraid.  They would put their own safety aside to make sure I was protected and never alone.   They would be supportive , and Tenacious, and freely lend me all that  I had lost along the way:  Their steadfast courage, their unwavering hearts and their solid wisdom.

wizard friends

  • And lastly I needed to remember that I am  most POWERFUL WIZARD OF ALL: I just needed to pull back the curtain of my soul and truly be prepared for what stood behind it.
  • I could have taken this journey on the dirt roads of Kansas, or the Yellow brick roads leading to the land of OZ, it didn’t matter because always,  my journey was supposed to lead me somewhere over the rainbow,  back to the two things I had lost in the beginning of this story.

Myself and My Home

ruby red

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Toto, we are not in Kansas anymore.

  1. You are so fun, I’m so glad that you are my friend. I pray someday someone reads these life stories of yours a d turns them into a best selling book.
    Love You Dear.
    Sara

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s